Do you ever have one of those days where you feel like writing, you know you need to write, you have things you need to say, you WANT to say... but you just can't get it out? Not that you can't think of what to say or how to say it, but it just won't seem to transfer from your head to your hands so that you can write it all down?Today is that day.
I have always had an intense obsessions for photography. Whether it was taking it, or just looking at it, everything about it makes me feel good inside.
I talk about music healing your soul and how, when things are bad, music is always enough. I think, in a way, the same is true for any passion you have: namely for me, art.
The pictures I posted all mean something very different to me. It is a difficult thing to explain, but art can strike a million different emotions in you that can suprise even your ownself.
This picture is a bit small, but on the wall it says "There Is Always Hope"It's hard to tell, but the wall is actually a real wall and someone painted the girl and the balloon onto the wall. I thought it was so beautiful...
I took this picture with my phone, believe it or not. This is at the pier in San Clemente. I was doing a shoot of my friend for her new music she is working on and decided to snap this one. 
I don't know where I would be in life without my passions. My passion for music, photography, children, love, helping, smiling, laughing, aand just all around living... God created me to be a passionate person. That is why I talk about putting my heart into everything I do- because without that passion, things don't look quite as bright as they should.
Currently, writing is my main passion. I can tell when it is a day for writing because everything in my world, from the moment I wake up, seems surreal. I take a shower, brush my teeth, drink my coffee, drive to work and sit and wonder "What the heck did I do this morning? I am not sure I remember any of it." Without realizing it, my mind was somewhere else. Creating some story line in my head that I have now forgotten.
Walking into work this morning was one such situation. I was walking across the lot and all of the sudden felt like everything around me was fake; it was some alternate universe that I was placed in for a few minutes, only to realize that I needed to be brought back down to earth so that I could concentrate on my day.
That's when I knew it was a day for writing.
However, like I mentioned earlier, I am having trouble getting these thoughts from my head, from my heart, to my fingertips. So, on the days that I know I need to write, but can't think of what to say, I talk about what I know. And today, that is passion.
I have talked before about not letting someone else be your "Jesus". In other words, don't let someone be your saviour. Like when something bad happens, and you think "If I could just see this person or be with this person, things would be better." sure, in a sense, things would be better.
But they can't save you from whatever it is that your struggling with. They can be there to help you, be your shoulder to cry on and what not.
But they cannot save you.
And that's okay.
People aren't meant to save us.
If I had to put my faith in the people around me, no offense, but I would be a bit terrified of what would happen. Don't get me wrong, I love everyone and everything in my life, but if I were to ever hit rock bottom, if my world were to ever fall apart completely (again...), I would need more than just a shoulder to cry on.
There is a feeling, a change, that happens in your heart when you get up off the ground and start looking for what peices you're going to use to put your life back together. A change that can only be described as supernatural...
I always intend to make my blogs a bit shorter, to make it easier to read, but that never happens. I feel like I can't get the words out, and then once I do, they won't stop flowing. Not a bad thing, I suppose ;)
LOVELOVELOVE
Carrie